Today I’m writing from home because I still don’t have web access right now. Only heaven knows when this will actually hit cyber space, but no worries, gona write anyway. So like I said before I am currently pregnant (yay!) but really, I don’t even know what to do with myself. Recently, my emotions have been all over the place, and I’m only 4weeks into this. How crazy is that? I’ve gone from being really excited wanting to tell the world, to really nervous, wondering if I really am pregnant. I’m pretty sure I am…I can feel my body is doing some crazy stuff. I’ve taken three test and they all been faint results; honestly I was hoping for a strong ‘yes’ no questions, solid, matter a of fact…but no dice...just two little lines...that's all i have to go off of. With the faint hpt I’ve kinda been freaking out. For about a day and a half I walked around worrying and wondering if I were pregnant or just plain sick.
To spite my doubtful moments, I did however pick up two pregnancy books to read, and I’m thrilled to point out that neither of these book are the cliché: “What to Expect When Expecting”. I’m proud of that actually… that book is over- rated and I don’t want the commercial version of being pregnant, I want the facts and real tips/guidelines to follow to ensure the healthiest most perfect baby ever. J
Thinking about it now, I can’t believe I figured out I was pregnant at 3 weeks and 3 days. (whoo I'm good) Ha! Most women don’t notice anything until 6 or 8weeks. By then it’s a little too late to clean your act up and try to make sure the baby will be okay. They say the most critical time is the first 3-8weeks. The 1st trimester is so important. And that’s where most miscarriages happen too.
God I hope I don’t have a miscarriage. I’m trying so hard to make my body healthy and do everything right. I want this baby so very badly.
>>>Do u see this? The way my mind just jumps from one thing to the next, over joyed to worry wart in 2.7 seconds. <<<
This whole baby thing has been good for Ty and I though. Not saying that I believe having some dude’s baby will make him love you, but I am saying I feel closer and stronger in the relationship Ty and I share..(even though we just got into an argument). I’m excited to be having his baby, when he lays his hand on my non-existent belly…I can’t imagine being in this position with anyone else. Ty finally had the reaction I was hoping for when I first told him I was pregnant. Don’t get me wrong he seemed happy when I told him the news, but literally the next day after work, he came up to me, gave me a huge hug and whispered… "I can’t believe I’m about to have a baby with the woman of my dreams, my best friend, my wife.” I almost cried. He is so wonderful sometimes…he definitely has his moments. Uh, I love him. <3
I want a little girl…Ty wants a boy. I might go insane if i have to live with all boys #soserious. But really a part of me hopes for fraternal twins, a girl and a boy so we’re both happy. Hahahaha
So this is day 252…count down! I can’t wait for my first ultrasound!!!! 3 more weeks till i get to hear the baby's heartbeat! *heavy sigh* I can't wait!!
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